the good news

lent.

nope. not the stuff that you find in your belly button. not even the stuff that you find in your dryer after a fresh load of clothes.

lent.

 a season of preparation. expectation of redemption. hope for new life.

"The tradition of Lent- a forty-day sacrifice-is one way of mourning the death that sin has caused in our lives. As we see Jesus perfectly withstand Satan's temptation in the wilderness, we admit our own shortcomings, our own inadequate sacrifices. This period of "giving up" has a profound way of recalling our desperate need for Jesus Christ." - from Devotions for Lent, Mosaic Holy Bible

I have really loved reflecting on the weight of the gospel this season.

A Gospel Primer for Christians has been a huge blessing! It is basically the gospel spelled out in tons of different ways, perspectives over and over...all based on scripture. I have really cherished going though it slowly and really taking in the weighty-ness of the words, and meditating on the scriptures it refers to. It also teaches how necessary it is for us to preach the gospel to ourselves...everyday.

It holds such gems:

"The deeper I go into the gospel, the more I comprehend and confess aloud the depth of my sinfulness. A gruesome death like the one that Christ endured for me would only be required for one who is exceedingly sinful and unable to appease a holy God. Consequently, whenever I consider the necessity and manner of His death, along with the love and selflessness behind it, I am laid bare and utterly exposed for the sinner I am. Such an awareness of my sinfulness does not drag me down, but actually serves to lift me up by magnifying my appreciation of God's forgiving grace in my life. And the more I appreciate the magnitude of God's forgiveness of my sins, the more I love Him and delight to show Him love through heart-felt expressions of worship."

and my favorite so far (worth the long read!!):

"Viewing life's blessings as water in a drinking cup, I know that I could discontentedly focus on the half of the cup that seems empty, or I could gratefully focus on the half that is full. Certainly, the latter approach is the better of the two, yet the gospel cultivates within me a richer gratitude than this.

The gospel reminds me first that what I actually deserve from God is a full cup churning with the torments of His wrath. This is the cup that would be mine to drink if I were given what I deserve each day. With this understanding in mind, I see that to be handed a completely empty cup from God would be cause enough for infinite gratitude. If there were merely the tiniest drop of blessing contained in that other wise empty cup, I should be blown away by the unbelievable kindness of God toward me. That God, in fact, has given me a cup that is full of "every spiritual blessing in Christ," and this without the slightest admixture of wrath, leaves me truly dumbfounded with inexpressible joy. As for my specific earthly circumstances of plenty or want, I can see them always as infinite improvements on the hell I deserve.

When I look at any circumstance that God apportions me, I am first grateful for the wrath I am not receiving in that moment. (The empty part of the cup never looked so good!) Second, I am grateful for the blessings that are given to me instead of His wrath. (Life's blessing, however small, always appear exceedingly precious when viewed against the backdrop of the wrath I deserve.) This two-layered gratitude disposes my heart to give thanks in all thing and it also lends a certain intensity to my giving of thanks. Such a gospel-generated gratitude glorifies God, contributes to peace of mind, and keeps my foot from the path of foolishness and ruin."

good stuff!

More gospel goodness:

G.O.S.P.E.L. from Humble Beast Records on Vimeo.


Ok one last thing... sort of on the subject of books and grateful hearts.
I read One Thousand Gifts while in Costa Rica...

o. ya. Will and I went to Costa Rica! (update with pics to come!)

...and it was such a good book! It is basically Ann Voskamp's story and her journey to discovering eucharisto and finding joy and thankfulness in her life. She is a gifted writer and I ate. it. up! You should check out her blog too!

ok. that's all for now. more to come!

we've been blogged. and random thoughts.

check it out! 

Real BCS Weddings blogged about our wedding! I will never get tired of looking at our wedding pictures! If you want to see the whole loot- check them out on the side bar under "05.08.10"

Randomness- begin: 

Will and I are still alive! He's busy with school and work. I'm busy with school **can you believe I graduate in MAY!?** and mostly sitting for the CPA. One part down, three to go.
I'm also preparing with Talitha Dance Company for Masterpiece Conference in early March.

We are learning a lot, living a lot...

Last weekend we went camping with some friends. It was good for the soul to be outside and not in the library.

We celebrated valentine's with a gift card to Veritas from our sweet roomie Amy. It was delish!

We officially booked our 1 year anniversary fun trip. We are going to....drum roll please......
COSTA RICA! And to make it even better, we are going with our best friends the Blessings! It's their babymoon before sweet Olivia Joy arrives!

Currently I have been listening to Will Reagan and the United Pursuit Band over and over and over. If you haven't listened/worshiped with these guys- you must check them out. good.for.the.soul!

Lately, I have been faced with some really hard realities of the sex trafficking industry. Like this:

The U.S. Department of Justice estimates that 14,500-17,000 people are trafficked annually into the United States; with 25% of trafficked persons coming through Texas. Based on that estimation, the Dallas police anticipated their annual number of trafficked persons to double, if not triple, over Super Bowl weekend.


Can you believe that Houston and Dallas are major hubs for sex traffickers? Check out this website that has some really great information and inspiring stories about how the Lord is redeeming this industry.

Also, I may or may not have been in a music video. :) It's a funny story. When it's released, I will for sure link up to it.

I hope you have a lovely Tuesday!

In the Splendor of His Holiness

(will) so this is my first blog ever. i am currently with aubrey and we're both seeking the Lord together, but separately, and i thought this would be a good time for me to blog. it's not really a normal 'mode of worship' for me, but that's almost what spurred me on to do it. 

my comfort in worship is to sing

my norm is to shout Your name

but when will i step out into the rain

to feel broken and naked, yet unashamed

i only seek the Lord in one place: through singing and playing my guitar. but what does that mean for every other aspect of my life? if i don't spend time to know Him and worship Him outside of the ways that i already do, i am limiting who He is to me, what He can do for me. it's all contingent on what i feel and what i want and what i need and when i have time. it seems so selfish. so is this really worship? am i true to myself or to the Lord when i sing 'all to you i surrender' or 'from the inside out my soul cries out?' 

there is no place that i can hide

no room for dark, no shade inside

why do i shield my eyes from the light

when it's You, Lord

i often talk about how worship should be my life, and not just a designated time to seek after the Lord in song or in reading the bible. but i admit that i don't do that. I don't understand the Splendor of Your Holiness. the concept is vivid in my head. i understand what my life is supposed to look like, but i can't and don't actively do that. so where does my discipline meet the Lord's power and grace in my life? i am insufficient in meeting my own expectations and the Lord knows that. so how much is expected of me? i know that i can only meet the standards that i uphold to myself through God's grace, but how much of it is a reflection of truly understanding His glory? 

i don't want this to become a i'm-good-christian-if-i-act-a-certain-way type of thing in my life. i also don't want to be hard on myself for not seeking the Lord in every aspect of my life. and i think that it comes down to desiring the pursuit of righteousness rather than obtaining righteousness. and that should be read loosely. i know that righteousness comes with certain connotations that i don't want to touch on, but the reality of it is that we are made righteous in Christ; i should desire to be Holy as You are Holy.

this is where i struggle. this is where my mind goes - finding the lines between legalism and discipline, laziness and understanding my imperfections, freedom from sin and righteousness found in You. Lord, fine-tune me to understand true worship. let my desire not be to obtain actions, thoughts, or a certain posture, but that i would desire You. i don't deserve what i have been given. i don't understand your Grace. i don't understand how you can be so beautiful and glorious and powerful and perfect, and still care about me. and because of all of this, i am drawn to worship. i am drawn to throw up my hands and say 'You are Lord' and to smile and to cry and to laugh and to shout and to strum and to dance and to get out of breath and to yearn and to suffer and to be broken and to grow - You are worthy of this and more.

my intention with this post was not to shed light on me; yes, i do want you to know where i struggle and where i am at with worship. but i really want to share what worship means to me - and even what i still don't get or do or understand. i hope that in some way it helps you meet with the Lord. after all, shouldn't that also be an intention of our worship?

joy costs pain

I should be studying for a midterm I have tomorrow, but I couldn't pass up sharing this with you...
If you have time... please read this whole post here, or start following this blog (link "the Journey" at the right of this page.) it will change you... I promise.

I NEED this perspective in my life, this constant reminder of things happening in the nations, around the globe, down the street... outside of my own little world.

from Katie:
        "I would like to tell you that as I become more and more surrounded with sorrow and squalor, it gets easier or less painful. But it doesn’t. The brokenness of this world does not become any less sad. Each and every time, it is overwhelmingly devastating that people have to live, and die, like this. While it does not get easier, I have found that I am able to face each one with a little more hope. I always hope that my friends will live here on earth with me, but I tell them all with a new sense of urgency about Jesus because mostly, I want them to live with HIM, whether here or in heaven. I see the sadness, but I also see the redemption.
         If we are really following Jesus, we will go to the hard places. Being a Christ follower means being acquainted with sorrow. Because we must know sorrow to be able to fully appreciate Joy. Joy costs pain, but the pain is worth it.
        So we go. This is where our family is today and where I hope to stay – loving, because He first loved us. Going into the pit, entering into the sorrow because He entered for us first and because by His grace, redemption is on the other side - again, and again, and again."

Unearthed

"Be ready. The time's coming"—God's Decree—"when I will plant people and animals in Israel and Judah, just as a farmer plants seed. And in the same way that earlier I relentlessly pulled up and tore down, took apart and demolished, so now I am sticking with them as they start over, building and planting."

Jeremiah 31:27-28 (The Message)

This is what the Lord is doing all around me. He's ripping up deep deep roots that don't belong. Roots that grew too quickly, in the wrong place, or even roots that have gone bad and decayed. He's taking apart lives, demolishing plans and preconceived ideas. He's tearing down walls, ripping open hearts, exposing the broken places.

It's hard. It's messy. It's uncomfortable and even hurts. The soil is all over the place. At times the garden appears to be in chaos.

but He's at work. active. moving.

tilling. breaking down. preparing a plot for fresh vision, new life, faith sprouting up, room for growth.

Only after this happens, is He able to "start over, build and plant."

Only after He exposes the broken, can he heal.

Only after shaking things up, can he truly establish his unshakable foundation.

Redemption is near. I can feel it in the shaking soil.

Let the harvest begin.

Music for the Soul

how about some music for the soul on this loverly saturday? here are some songs that I'm loving these days.

the first two are by this guy: will matthews. he leads at bethel and is currently recording his album. CAN'T. WAIT. you tube videos with bad quality with have to do for now. (and sometimes I make Will lead "Hope's Anthem" just so I can hear it.)

and a fun one:

and if you need one more. check out this budding gem, jada. she's pretty sweet.

What music have you been listening to? Comment with your favorite music! I love new stuff!

and so it begins!

school that is. today was my first day back in class... even though its only been a few weeks since I stepped off campus for summer school. This day marks the LAST first day of school. ever. It's totally a weird feeling. I still don't know what to make of it.

Will started school last Wednesday and textbooks are officially in season... so this new season of life begins!

There are few things that I'm intentionally doing starting today. I want to document them to see how long they last. My hope is that this day marks a change in lifestyle vs. a fleeting new school year resolution. I'm super hopeful about how this affects my life, in several ways. And I plan to document them here, ideally. : )

Things that I'm starting today:

1. I'm becoming super disciplined about time in scripture and with the Lord. Quiet time, if you will. Lately, the Lord has given me a great hunger for his Word and I discovered I'm starving! Literally my soul is malnourished- no exaggeration. I find such life and satisfaction in scripture, why don't I spend more time there! I'm super grateful that the Lord has revealed this to me and given me a desire to spend time with him. This is probably one of the things I'm most excited about. I'm waking up way earlier than I would have ever imagined to guarantee time with Him. I found some really fun devotionals at Half Price Books recently and I'm planning as using those as supplements to digging into scripture. I'm currently doing a weekly study on "Living in Jesus" and a daily study on "Spiritual Gifts." Such good stuff.

2. I'm taking my waking temperature and recording it. If you don't know what that means or what its for: here.

3. I'm exercising every morning with the loverly Megan (see picture below) at the Rec! We are doing the 7:30 class Monday-Thursday and then Cycle & Body Blaster on Fridays in the afternoons. This is going to be a great way to kick start my mornings and be motivated for the rest of the day. Also, if I don't do this in the morning, it gets really difficult to fit it later into the rest of the day. This morning was a kick in the pants. You can ask Megan, I was probably the worst one in the class. This will change soon!

4. I'm taking my vitamins! Yes! Can you believe it!? My mom would be so proud. If you have to know, I'm taking Prenatal vitamins (no, we are not preggers) and a separate iron supplement.

The list may seem small and meager, but its a big deal for this one here. Obviously the regular school stuff starts today too. *Insert forced smile*

Just a quick update on all that you missed/I didn't blog about:

• my birthday was SO fun. we went to Austin for a night. Did the typical: Alamo Drafthouse, Sixth Street, live Jazz music, Chuy's with the beautiful Aunt Tammy, Botanical Gardens, and playing around in the park, with the camera.

• Will MADE me an awesome present. He is so cool. He got the idea and plans from this blog. Here is a picture of what it will look like:

It's called at puzzle bookcase because the middle pieces aren't connected. It makes it a very versatile piece. It can go flat against a wall, in a corner, or be pushed completely together if there isn't a lot a space. I will post pics when we get it painted and set up. Thanks husband!

• I got a job! Yup. While I was sitting around the apartment during my break, I got a little stir crazy. I'm now working as a personal assistant for a beautiful woman, Traci Smith. It was truly the Lord that made this happen. I'm really excited to be working with her and helping her reach her goals this year. Also, it's a great job that's super flexible while I'm in school.
• We went to camp. church camp that is. Remove all the images and ideas you have stored up in your brain about what church camp is. Get rid of kumbaya around the camp fire, a bunch of kiddos hyped up on sugar, crazy counselors & lots of drama. Say hello to awesome community, uninterrupted relational time, lots of porch swings, fun activities, worship, prayer, healing, remembering, dreaming, and more.

I have lots of thoughts and things I want to blog about. Hopefully this week I can catch this up with all the things I have going on in my head. I'm exploding with ideas, things I've read, stories I've been challenged by... life. I truly want this to be a place of growth, of development. (mostly for me, but for anybody else who decides to join me along for the ride) Soon I'll be sharing a few stories, thoughts on money and finances and some things the Lord has been stirring in me.

This blog is already waaaaay too long for me to get into all that.

But for the time being, check out the side bar to the right for some really neat stuff under Kingdom things.

Anthology

Anthology:

–noun, plural -gies.

1. a book or other collection of selected writings by various authors, usually in the same literary form, of the same period, or on the same subject.

2. a collection of selected writings by one author

blog world- Agnors. Agnors- blog world.

its official. The Agnors are blogging! After weeks of debating on what to call this thing, (we had several suggestions like "Willbrey comin' around the mountain") we have decided for now to title our blog "Agnor Anthology." I think that is a good description of what this place will be. I hope to record the significant and not so significant happenings in our life. I think it will be really sweet to look back through the years and see where the Lord has taken us. I'm reminded of an old friend that told me the biggest hindrance to faith is forgetfulness. how true! I DO NOT want to forget what the Lord has done in my/our life. As I look back on old writings, I want to be stirred up in faith. I want these posts to bring about gratefulness in my heart... and hope for what is to come.

so here's to lots of memories, faith rising up.... and blogging!